Learning from a Traumatic Experience

Every experience in life is a learning opportunity, including our auto accident on July 30.  What have I learned from this trauma?

 
I’ve learned anew that God’s grace sees us through.  God’s grace is ever-present and sustaining.

I’ve learned that angels appear when we need them.  First, it was Sandy’s husband, Mike, who came to care for us.  Then, it was our neighbors Roshani and Sumudu, who helped with our every need.  Not to mention many others who assisted us.

I’ve learned that I’m not as cheerful as I had thought, or hoped.  I’ve had to work on my attitude, changing my self-pity to something more worthwhile. 

I’ve learned that parents and caretakers deserve awards.  As I prepared meals three times a day and carried the meals upstairs on a tray for Bob, stuck in the upstairs bedroom, I thought about all the people I know who are moms and dads and caretakers.  They buy or grow food, scrub and store vegetables and fruit, prepare and serve meals, wash and put away dishes, and the next day it starts all over again.  My hat goes off to them.

I’ve learned  that I can be a good caretaker, helping with physical therapy, listening when needed, massaging a numb foot, providing comfort, making Bob laugh. 

I've learned that while government hospitals in Sri Lanka offer free health care to everyone, the care received may not match my North American expectations.  The hardest part?  The lack of opportunity to be given information and make thoughtful decisions.

I've learned that the victim is helpless in Sri Lanka.  These were the words of the police officer, who explained that full-coverage insurance is rare in Sri Lanka, and it was nothing unusual for the taxi we hired to not have insurance to cover our medical expenses.

I've learned that miracles do indeed happen.  How else could I have sent emails and photos to my family back home when I was in the hospital with a concussion?  I have few recollections of the time at the hospital and no recollection of our flights from the U.S., but somehow I figured out how to take photos AND RE-SIZE THEM and send them on to folks back home.  I have no idea how I did that.  I'm not even good at re-sizing photos when I haven't had a concussion!

I've learned that comfort food works.  Juliana, from the embassy, brought us chocolate chip cookies, pretzels, pudding, and peanut butter.  It made us feel better; hence, the name.

I've learned that one day at a time works.  There’s no other choice anyway, but focusing on the present really works when one is discouraged.

I've learned that email is awesome when one feels isolated in a foreign country and far from home.    Emails from family and friends kept our spirits up.  Phone calls with our parents were equally vital—their  love and concern really touched us.

I've learned that there are compassionate, caring people all over the world.  I knew this before, but the amazing support we have received just confirmed it.

I've learned that it’s a small world.  Bonnie King, the wife of Dad’s first cousin, Stan King, a tennis coach at Goshen College, put us in touch with Sarath and Ione Algama from Colombo, whose son played tennis at Goshen College and graduated from there this year.  Sarath and Ione arranged a car and driver for us when we needed to travel back to Colombo to visit the doctor.  Not just any car, but a new Mercedes at that.  Connections like that were made by several other people we know—it is indeed a small and wonderful world.

I've learned that our bodies (and minds) heal when given the time and rest to do so.  Watching Bob’s progress, and experiencing my own, has been amazing.